1000 Not Out!

This is my 1000th Blog Post!

Number 1 was a bit serious - I hadn't got into my stride of  commenting on car news items at that point.

And I was right. 

That was November 2009 by the way - when the World was a better place but we didn't know it.

In fact, it wasn't until 2021 that the end of the World was announced.

By me.

And it was 2018 when I foresaw the end of Top Gear.  I may not have said it, but I definitely foresaw it.

Number 999, just last week, was an amusing electric Bentley story.

So, what have I got for today's Number 1000 story?

An amusing story about a Yorkshire cyclist who decided that a car had passed him too closely so sent footage of it to the Police.

That footage also showed the cyclist squeezing his bike through this gap:

(The car on the left is parked)

The BBC story is here together with the video. There is no news of the car driver that he reported.  But there is news that the cyclist ending up with over £1200 in fines for riding without due care and attention.

I have a vision of the police officer watching the footage then spotting this.

Poetic.

Powerless

The BBC have had a go at Boris Johnson today.

Unusually.

Political reporter Jennifer Scott was much harsher than Laura Kuenssberg would have been.

Good.

Basically, Johnson made a speech which was supposed to promote electric motoring and green business to the CBI.  But he lost his place and waffled on about Peppa Pig World for a bit making a few lame jokes.

Embarrassing.

An earlier version of the Jennifer Scott story had lots of motoring references about him taking the wrong turn and other such also lame jokes.  That version seems to have disappeared.

Probably for the best.

Now, talking about electric cars and the BBC and embarrassing, did you see Top Gear this weekend?

After a promising series opener last week with a very moving tribute to Eddie Kidd, this week they went caravanning using luxury electric cars as their tow-cars. It included a puerile and pointless attempt to lap their cars around the top of a mountain while eating stronger and stronger chillies culminating in Paddy McGuinness spitting out a mouthful of milk over Freddie Flintoff and the interior of a Mercedes EQC.

They then had to drive to Barnard Castle (which brings us back to Johnson embarrassment) without recharging - and they ran out of charge.  Actually, Chris Harris did get there but only by ditching his caravan so the whole exercise was a waste of time.

There is only one solution to both of these situations.

Pointless

There is something wrong with the British public.

Actually, we already knew that - Boris Johnson and Brexit prove that.

But they seem ignorant on important matters too.

There must also be something wrong with Top Gear.

I've just been watching Pointless.  They had a round on Top Gear presenters - 16 photos and the contestants had to identify the presenters in the photos.

Obviously I knew them all so I decided to go with Jon Bentley - I figured he was a shoe-in to be a pointless answer.

Here are the results straight from the TV on my bedroom wall:

Two members of the British public knew who Jon Bentley is.

Two also knew who Sabine Schmitz is.

BUT ONLY ONE KNOWS WHO CHRIS HARRIS IS!

And nobody knows who Vicki Butler-Henderson is!

Crazy!

Jeremy was top scorer and those famous for other things all scored highly too.

I'm not convinced that when Richard Osman, the man with all the answers, said that Top Gear was Kate Humble's big break in TV, that he was right.  I seem to remember her already being famous and her joining Top Gear and me thinking that she was a poor choice since she seemed to know bugger all about cars and driving - how history repeats itself.

And then Richard Osman pointed out that Tiff Needell ought to be Tiffany Dell and Alexander Armstrong asked him what Tiff was short for - Richard Osman, the man with all the answers, got it wrong.

He needs to read my blog.

Bully For You

We're three episodes in now.

Two to go.

Another short series.

It was starting to grow on me a bit.

But last night's show began to confirm my fears.

The bit last week when Oscar-winning director Danny Boyle and star of his new film Himesh Patel had to drive at speed at a closing barrier seemed a bit childish and unnecessary.

This week they had Olympic Horsewoman and Queen's Grand-daughter Zara Tindall together with her England Rugby star husband Mike driving a Jag at speed between two bollards for no good reason.

I suppose it makes the interviews a bit shorter for them but I'd rather know a bit more about the guests than see this.

 

I'm hoping that TG doesn't go the same way as Driven did during its death throes - that was such a shame.

But the bit that made me feel really uncomfortable was when Paddy and Freddie were stopping Chris from winning the stuff-as-much-stuff-into-a-family-car competition.

It looks like I wasn't alone with the word "bullying" coming into my head.  Here's the Metro (the Newspaper) report on the ensuing Twitter-storm.

 

I wonder if that is why they got shut of Rory Reid - they can cope with accusations of bullying but racist bullying would be going too far.

 

Chris has taken to Twitter himself to say that he didn't feel victimised and that the others are really kind people.

 

I suppose he had to do that or they'd have beaten him up.

27 Not Out?

Series 27 episode 1 of Top Gear has aired.

The one I was hoping not to like.

Well, it wasn't awful.  The relationships between the three presenters is promising and given that I like all three of them then I suppose that was always likely to be the case.

The BBC are bigging it up as you would expect.  They say that the critics give it "warm praise."  But then they open up that story to the Gammons who infest the BBC News Website with the predicted result.  I do hope that anyone who reads the comments on BBC News doesn't think that they are indicative of British attitudes.

So what did I think?  I enjoyed the Ethiopia bit.  I also enjoyed the Ferrari and McLaren bit but the fact Chris had to do it just shows that we have gone from three car experts (James, Jeremy & Richard) down to two and a half car experts (Chris, Rory & Matt) down to one car expert (Chris) - this will hamper what Top Gear is meant to be and also hamper the discussions within the banter.

Based on episode 1, I am willing to give it another go - I'll probably last the series but I don't see myself being bowled over.

Am I Going to be Disappointed on Father's Day?

Unfortunately, I expect so.

And there's nothing my children can do about it.

You see the BBC have chosen Father's Day to begin the new series of Top Gear.

Radio Times have been getting very excited about it.

It's on the front cover:

They also have this feature and this article online in which Chris Harris claims the new team will be better than Jeremy, James & Richard.

No it won't.

One preview clip presented to journalists featured Flintoff rubbing his unwashed hands over Harris after visiting the toilet.

Rory Reid's demotion is more pronounced too with the axing of his Extra Gear show.

I'll still be watching - I've got to give it a fair chance - but I can't believe that I'll be wanting it to fail. And maybe it won't - maybe I'll like it.

And maybe Brexit will be a success.

Duns-Folding?

Interesting story from Autoguide this week about the Top Gear Test Track.

The test track made famous by Jeremy, James & Richard but now being used by Matt, Chris & Rory.

 

Following on from the planning permission requested for a mega-motor museum in Oxfordshire, we now have a planning permission request to turn the Dunsfold Aerodrome in Surrey (better known as the Top Gear Test Track) into a mega-housing development.

 

Sacrilege!

 

Although it is amusing to read in the article that the Americans think Surrey has its own Secretary of State.

 

Anyway, a bit more digging brings up this Waverley Borough Council page about the proposals.

 

The page owner is Ben HAMMOND.

 

Coincidence!?

 

Yes, probably.

Edd's Gone!!!

And I don't mean Edd The Duck.    

No, I mean the only other "Ed" who spells his name with two D's - Edd China:

I was going to do a posting today about Sunday's Top Gear - I had a couple of ideas and was definitely going to mention my favourite quote of the show:

"The Suspects are Joey from Friends and a bald guy in a bad suit."

or maybe I was going to complain about them dissing the Dolomite Sprint...

...which led into Rory Reid driving the most famous car on TV (if you watch car shows) - a Mark I Golf GTi carrying Reg. number A651FEJ:

Here's Jeremy with it:

 

and here it is on Car SOS:

This may well be it again but I'm not going to find the episode in the second series of Wheeler Dealers - Trading Up to find out:

It's not appeared on For The Love of Cars yet though.

And here we arrive at the big news story of today:

Discovery today announced established automotive expert Ant Anstead is the new co-host and master mechanic on the global hit series WHEELER DEALERS. After 13 seasons, longtime co-host and lead mechanic Edd China has decided to leave the series to pursue other projects. WHEELER DEALERS will continue for a season 14 later this year with current co-host Mike Brewer who will now be joined by Anstead. Ant Anstead is the former host of the Channel 4 series “For The Love Of Cars”

Wow!

Or I could have gone with...

"Opel cleared of diesel emissions cheating by French authorities"

...an Autocar story today which comes just after it was announced that Opel was to become part of the PSA Group which is part-owned by the French authorities.

No - the Edd news is much bigger.  A bit like him.

Cool As FXXK

The Arctic Circle is pretty cool.

Or downright freezing.

And that is where they are testing the next iteration of the Black Cab.

Why? - I hear you ask.

Why? - I also hear BBC Transport correspondent Richard Westcott ask.

But he doesn't actually answer the question in that video.

Although he does in this article.

There are two reasons apparently:

• the manufacturer tests all new vehicles in extreme temperatures to see how they perform.
• it wants to sell it in polluted cities all over the world, including Moscow, which can get a little chilly in the winter.

This cab won't contribute to the pollution due to it being electric - with a little range-extender to keep it going.

Anyway, black cabs in cold places brings us, rather neatly, round to the new series of Top Gear:

and Rory Reid driving a black cab, in minus temperatures, with no heating, in Kazakhstan.

Chris Harris got to drive a Ferrari FXXK at Daytona

 

and boy did he enjoy it.

But, if only 40 were built, why did his have a number 54 on the side?

And nobody mentioned Chris Evans.

I thought they could have had a light-hearted dig like The Grand Tour boys did.  Chris himself mentioned how the newspapers said it was "better without the annoying one".

There was a mention in Extra Gear about the orginal test track being back with "all tarmac" but nothing was said about Mr.Evans.  There was a noticeable cheer from the studio audience when it was announced that the original track was back.

I agree with the studio audience and, much as I do like Chris Evans, I agree with the newspapers that it was "better without the annoying one".

Or maybe just a little cooler.

The Countdown Is Over

Carol Vorderman is dead.

Actually, she's very much alive and rocking it in the jungle and planning a round-the-world solo airplane trip.

She just pretended to be dead in the opening show of the opening series of

THE GRAND TOUR!

As did a couple of actors who I wasn't sure who they were.  I didn't recognise them and Jeremy mumbled their names but I'm glad we didn't have quarter of an hour listening to them talking about their latest projects.

So what did the BBC think of the show?

They just told us what the critics thought of the show.

So what did the critics think of the show?

They really liked it.  They described it as "filmic" which I don't reckon is a word.  Perhaps I could ask Countdown's Susie Dent.

 

I wish.

So what did I think of the show?

I thought the opening sequence went on a bit long - but I suppose that added tension and expectation and the show did last 70 minutes to make up for that.

I didn't see the point of the fight sequence - could have done without that.

Not sure about the new "Stig" - I think he may be a Trump supporter.

And I thought overall that the whole thing was...

...brilliant!!

Much as I like LeBlanc, Harris & Reid, the chemistry between Clarkson, Hammond & May is unparallelled (is that spelled correctly, Susie?)  I think the BBC need to rethink Top Gear now, admit defeat, and turn it back into a car show.

With a bit of careful juggling of free trials and having a couple of weeks break in the middle of the 12 episodes, I could possibly see the lot for free - but worst-case scenario is it costs me £11.98 - a price I'm willing to pay.  I've sorted the numbers so it's no conundrum. (more Countdown references in case you've no idea who Vorderman is)

3 Is The Magic Number - Unless You're Talking about the Number of Wheels on a Car.

Of course I watched the new Top Gear last night.

So did a lot of other people.

And a lot of people have given their views on it - including Fleet Street people.

The guy in The Independent didn't like it much.  I did enjoy his writing style though.  Unusually for The Telegraph, their reviewer didn't hate car programmes.  But, over all, he reckoned it could probably do better. The Guardian didn't bother reviewing it so let their readers do it instead.  Guardian readers are not known for having petrol running through their veins so, not unsurprisingly, they gave it a general thumbs-down.

Which brings us around to me.

I thought it had its moments.

Not too many of them though.  The Corvette/Viper shoot-out could have been done just as well without the shooting bit.

And the road-trip to Blackpool just didn't do anything for me.

Top Gun pukey bloke and the Blackpool Lord Mayor were both quite good.  And the cinematography was up to the excellent standards of Clarkson Top Gear.

But something was still missing.

Apart from "The News" which was always one of my favourite bits of the show.

Which brings us to the comedy rule of three.  Here's the Wiki explanation of it.

They need Eddie Jordan or Chris Harris in the studio and on the road trips so that two of them can always pick on the third.  Then, as the chemistry between them kicks in, we will have a good show - like, The Goodies or Last of the Summer Wine which, let's face it, Clarkson, Hammond & May were definitely turning in to.  Having said that, I am noticing that Chris Evans appears to be turning into Foggy Dewhurst:

There was no sign of Jordan, Harris or Rory Reid - Reid being the one worrying me most simply because I had no experience of his work.  I needn't have feared though - he turned up on Extra Gear on the BBC iPlayer (or BBC Three if you are being pedantic) in a little 25 minutes after-show alongside Chris Harris.  It included a comedy guest (Chris Ramsey) and "The News".  I have to say, I enjoyed it more than I enjoyed Top Gear.

Still no mention of Jordan - who I used to enjoy being the grumpy one when appearing on the BBC F1 coverage with Martin Brundle & David Coulthard - rule of three again.

So, still early days, give them chance to gel and let's see what we end up with.  I'm not convinced that the writing is as sharp as Clarkson's - although there were a few good bits like, "We got custody!" and maybe Evans needs to calm down a bit.  Whatever happens, I think TG has a future (as does GT - Clarkson and Co have a name at last) - even if it is with Harris & Reid.

The Magnificent Seven

So here it is...

...in Chris Evans' own words...

The new Top Gear line-up!

Not bad - not sure I'd go as far as "magnificent" (but that's probably only because I've not heard of one of them)

Eddie Jordan was a pleasant surprise - I enjoy a dour expert who isn't afraid to put over his point and get a good argument going.

Obviously, LeBlanc came on board this time last week.

I'm also very pleased that the lovely Sabine Scmitz is in there but I also know that the "politically correct" comments will have begun - especially since the unknown guy is a "gentleman of colour" - am I allowed to say that?  I'm sure these choices will wind up many people who thoroughly deserve to be wound up.

Tough.

So, roll on May.  (not James May)

Car Matt

After much speculation, we now know the name of Chris Evans' first co-host on new Top Gear.

It's Matt LeBlanc!

This is a major departure for him.

This is because he has never starred in a show with more than one word in the title before.

Speculation in December concentrated on the names Sabine Schmitz, Chris Harris & David Coulthard.  I guess that speculation didn't look far enough away from Europe.  I would be happy if any or all of these three joined the show - it doesn't have to have exactly three presenters after all - and these three are racers or motoring journos, my favourite two categories of people to present TV car shows.

Something that Chris Evans and Matt LeBlanc are not.

But Top Gear is not so much a TV car show so much as an entertainment, nay comedy, show with a big car content.

I'm very happy.  Both have proved themselves car-wise and Matt led the Star-in-a-Reasonably-Priced-Car leaderboard for quite a while.

It was always going to be a very difficult job replacing Jeremy, James and Richard. They seem to be going about it the right way.  Very impressive casting.

Now we need some very impressive writing.

Wonder if Matt knows any good comedy writers?

2013 Astra For Sale

Seemed to be very reasonably priced too.

Actually it wasn't.  The e-Bay Auction finished this morning and it went for £17800 which is quite a lot for a 2013 Astra.

Especially one that can't be legally driven on UK roads.

Even if Will Smith has had a go in it.

But it was for charity - the auction - not the Will Smith bit.

It is the most recent Top Gear "Star in a Reasonably Priced Car" car.  I found the story on the Fox News Site.  Can't say it's been well publicised.

You do get a look at the driver's view though.

Don't know why but I was expecting something different to Astra bog-standard.

I guess this means that this car will not be featuring in the new look show.  This may mean that the whole "Star in a Reasonably Priced Car" segment could be dead.

Or they've just chosen another new car.

The Telegraph have been speculating a bit on the new series lately.  In this article, they claim that Chris Evans is giving up TFI Friday (I don't usually agree with The Telegraph but I did think it was a bit much him taking on that as well as his radio show and Top Gear) and on the new presenters.

I have heard that he will be joined by the names mentioned - Sabine Schmitz, Chris Harris & David Coulthard and, I have to say, if it's right, then that is a very strong team.

More than reasonable in fact.