I Fancy Tina Fey

 

Who wouldn't?

Well, I suppose a homosexual gentleman might not.  Although I have two gay friends who don't know each other and both fancy Kate Bush so who knows?

But that isn't what this post is about.

Women always claim to be attracted to men with a sense of humour.

I don't believe that.  I'm always considered my self quite funny (in the "ha ha" sense of the word not the "peculiar" sense of the word) but women have never thrown themselves at me.

Now, while it is possible that I am not funny (in the "ha ha" sense of the word), I really don't wish to countenance that idea.

Besides, I've noticed that women actually tend to go for tall, handsome men, irrespective of sense of humour.

I, on the other hand, generally find myself fancying women who are in to their cars - Vicki Butler-Henderson, Sabine Schmitz, Jodie Kidd and, more recently, Helen Stanley:

I would even forgive the tattoos.

I do also fancy Nigella Lawson but of you type "Nigella Lawson car" into Google, it wants to take you to "Nigella Lawson carrot cake"

Don't put vegetables into cakes!

Anyway, to finally get to the point, Tina Fey has finally bought her first car. Car+Driver have the story under the annoying headline:

Tina Fey Bought Her First Car during Lockdown, and It Might Surprise You

Normally I wouldn't touch a story like that because it would be some crap piece of click-bait but I like Car+Driver, I like Tina Fey and I like cars.

The gist of the story is that she bought a white Subaru Forrester - a fine enough car that I have no strong views about one way or another but I suppose it is a bit boring.

I was more shocked by Jimmy Fallon's admission that he had never heard of it.

Car+Driver misquote her a bit saying "her husband urged her to buy something fun, like a Mini Cooper or a Jeep (this is the point in the interview when it becomes clear that the Fey household is an expert-free zone when it comes to car shopping)"

According to Tina, her husband suggested "a Mini Cooper or something exciting like a Jeep or a BMW or something" I suppose a Jeep could be exciting depending in where you take it and some BMWs are certainly exciting but I think I'd have suggested a Ferrari or Aston Martin.

But she isn't a car person.

And yet I still fancy her.

I think it could be that she is a very funny lady (in the "ha ha" sense of the word)

Goodbye, Old Friend

Yesterday, The BBC told us that Matt LeBlanc will be leaving Top Gear.

That's a shame.  I liked him in that role.  Even when he said "Top Gear" with the emphasis wrong.

 

We've still got him for the next series though - so there's no need to worry just yet.

 

Although the BBC have already started speculating about his replacement.

 

Bit soon I think.

 

Strictly speaking, they don't actually need to replace him - but three presenters does seem to work very well for this type of show.

 

They could give a bigger input to Eddie Jordan and/or the lovely Sabine Schmitz.

 

The speculation currently includes Jodie Kidd - yes, I'll give that a thumbs up.

 

There's also Guy Martin - I could see that being OK.

 

There's also Dermot O'Leary and Rebecca Jackson.

 

No thank you.

 

Maybe they should look elsewhere within the cast of Friends:

Now I really like Matthew Perry and Jennifer Aniston but I'm not sure of their motoring pedigree.  While I quite like Lisa Kudrow, her character Phoebe annoyed me beyond belief so it's a no from me.

 

No, we need to look elsewhere within the world of US sitcoms.

 

Frasier? How I Met Your Mother? Big Bang Theory?

 

Ah, got it!

 

A right-wing Clarkson-esque elderly idiot:

Models

Sorry, that should read "Model S".

This story from Autocar today makes it look like Ford are being a bit cheeky.

It reports on how Ford are planning to get into the electric car segment using the name "Model E" - including a rival to Tesla's Model S.

In fact, according to that article, Ford blocked Tesla’s attempts to trademark the name "Model E" back in 2013 leading to Tesla then choosing the Model 3 name for its forthcoming entry-level car.

But, then again, Ford could have laid a claim to "Model S" too if they had wanted to - after all, they were using it 109 years ago:

This was a precursor to the more famous Model T - which I reported on in 2014 challenging a Tesla Model S to a race from Detroit to New York.

That article included this picture that I really liked:

And now this article gives me an excuse to publish another picture of a model that I really like.

Top Nearer?

So, the Sunday Express has revealed the BBC's "Dream Team" to take over from Jeremy, James & Richard?

And the rest of the World's press has run with the story.

Which is based on an overheard conversation between ex-show producer Andy Wilmin and Jay Kay of Jamoriqui fame.

So could be a load of tripe.

And even if it is right, there is no guarantee these three would sign up for the job.

Based on the reader comments (worldwide, not just the Express) any new presenters would be unwelcome but there is suspicion of Jodie's name in particular because it is believed that the BBC is being politically correct in choosing a woman.  It is true that I have said that I would like to see a woman or three in the line-up- but that is because I believe it would add a new twist to the show - but I would be just as happy with another three grumpy, middle-aged, white men again if the show continued to thrive.

Andy Wilmin is currently writing the story of Top Gear TV in Top Gear Magazine.  In it he states how the BBC did originally want a female presenter but he argued the toss and the all-male team was agreed upon and worked extremely well.

Right, what do I think of this so-called "dream team"?

Jodie Kidd - presenter of The Classic Car Show - needs to be a bit more natural in front of the camera but basically should be good.

Guy Martin - presenter of various things on Channel 4 but I know bugger all about his work

Philip Glenister - presenter of For The Love of Cars - typical grumpy, middle-aged, white man - should fit in very nicely.  Incidentally, For The Love of Cars seems to be turning into Car SOS.  This new series has just had two very soppy episodes where the finished car has been suspiciously sold at auction to someone guaranteed to make the original owner very happy.

Whoever they get, providing they are petrol-heads, I will watch and give the new show a fair go next year.  We have to trust the BBC on  this - I dread to think who ITV would choose if it were up to them...

 

Nightmare.

Top Near?

With the departure of Jeremy, lots of questions are being asked about the future of Top Gear.

• What will happen to the unshown episodes?
• Will it continue?
• Who would present it?
• What will Jeremy do next?
• What will Richard & James do next?
• Why am I asking these questions?

I'll take the last one first.  Top Gear has a lot of fans and Jeremy's contract was not renewed after his "fracas" - I went into more detail not long after it happened.  In that, I speculated that Jodie Kidd would be a good replacement - break up the testosterone a bit.

But let's not get ahead of ourselves.

What will happen to the unshown episodes?

They will be shown - or the already-filmed bits will anyway.

Will it continue?


Yes.

Who would present it?


Well, now isn't that the interesting bit?  This would hinge on whether we were just replacing Jeremy or replacing all three presenters. (I'm not including The Stig in this because he has been replaced at least twice and nobody really cared.)

If it was a straight-swap for Jeremy - middle-aged grumpy white bloke - then I would give the job without question to Jason Plato - I love hearing his quotes when something has gone wrong for him in the BTCC.

Today, however, James has been speaking to The Guardian and basically ruled himself out of appearing in Top Gear without Jeremy.  This would probably mean that Richard would do the same.

So we need three new presenters.  Channel controller Kim Shillinglaw has the job of finding these presenters - and she may be inclined to go along the female route.

My dream team in this case would be Sabine Schmitz, Jodie Kidd & Vicki Butler-Henderson.

Looks like former presenter Angela Rippon has thrown her name into the ring (not to be confused with "The 'Ring" which is where Sabine Schmitz made her name) - I can remember Angie as a Top Gear presenter but that was when it was a sensible car show.

Sue Perkins is another name linked with the job - in fact the bookmakers had her down as favourite - I don't know why - she has shown no interest in cars whatsoever as far as I know.  Sue then became the victim of all sorts of threats from various morons unhappy about the idea - I concur wholeheartedly with James' response.

I hope Kim will be casting these roles to people who do actually have an interest in cars, though.  In fact, I hope Andy Wilmin, the show's producer, has the final say.

What will Jeremy do next?


Another car show.

What will Richard & James do next?

Another car show - possibly with Jeremy.  They will probably also still be contracted to the BBC for their other projects (Total Wipeout, Manlab etc.) even though their Top Gear contracts have expired.  This could prevent them doing "Clarkson, May & Hammond" on Sky TV - for a while at least.  James sees the door still open for a return of the three of them with Top Gear on the BBC in the future - I don't see any legal reasons why not but I just don't envisage it.

They could remake Last of The Summer Wine though.

A lot has happened since these youngish men...

 ...became these oldish men...

And I'm sure the story isn't over yet.

The Guardian had the scoop interview with James today.

They also had this suggestion which I like a lot.  A heck of a lot.  Click on it.  Think regeneration Doctor Who style.

  Top Marx.

Some Say... ...He Doesn't Like Clarkson

Quite a clever headline in this week's Radio Times.  The subtitle is "The Stig gives his verdict on Clarkson"

Actually, The current Stig maintains his usual silence.  The original Stig admires Clarkson's style and thinks the show could not continue without him while making a reference to Last of The Summer Wine - which is a comparison I have myself considered on more than one occasion.  The second Stig clearly isn't a Jeremy fan but reckons that the show could continue without him.

In case you're wondering what I'm wittering on about, surely you must have heard the news by now about the rest of the current series of Top Gear being cancelled/postponed after Jeremy hit a producer on the show?

This story is worldwide!

Here is some of Australia's coverage.

And here is someone I feel very sorry for:

This is Oisin Tymon, the producer that Jeremy allegedly (or dare I say "actually"?) hit.  This guy has done nothing wrong.  It looks like he encountered a tired and emotional (usually a euphemism for "drunk") Jeremy who was knackered after a days filming and wanted some food - food that the hotel did not provide at that late hour.  So Jeremy took it out on this producer.  This producer is now getting all sorts of threats because the show is off the air possibly never to return.

This isn't Oisin's fault, it is Jeremy's!

Maybe Jeremy is now struggling to keep the show fresh after 13 years and it is getting to him.  It was Jeremy that reported the incident to the BBC hierarchy and Jeremy, in his newspaper column last week, who made a speech about dinosaurs having had their time.  That's a shame because I want the show to continue - and I want it to continue with Jeremy.  I did consider signing the Keep Jeremy petition that must be apporaching the million signatures mark by now but when I visited the site I decided that Guido Fawkes and his readers don't seem to be very nice people so I opted against being a co-signee.

If Jeremy cannot be persuaded to stay (I don't envisage a sacking) then I agree with Stig II that the show could go on without him.  Obviously speculation has begun with the not-too-serious suggestions of Nigel Farage, Boris Johnson, my favourite Vladimir Putin and Jeremy's nemesis Piers Morgan.

A more serious suggestion would be Jodie Kidd - she still seems a bit stilted on The Classic Car Show but she would bring a fresh new dynamic to the show stood alongside James & Richard.

Failing that, I'll do it.

I'm Not a Fan of Supermodels

I suppose I'm jealous of people who earn obscene amounts of money just because of how they look.

And they walk funny.

But I do admire Jodie Kidd.

She is more than a body.  She is an accomplished equestrian, a racer and she is intelligent.

And she is co-presenting The Classic Car Show on Channel 5.  (Although I caught episode 1 on Channel 5+24 - which shows Channel 5 a day late but rather than show yesterday's news and weather, they replace it with adverts for cruises)

Her co-presenter is Quentin Willson - the only smarmy person on TV I like since JR has died.

The show has a decent website.  It seems to be sponsored by a posh second-hand watch shop and Jaguar Heritage which could be a  bit worrying for product placement reasons but there was no actual evidence of it happening.

So what do I think of the show so far?

The opening titles were very cheesey but that's OK - there was much looking at watches to make sure they got to the studio on time - watches presumably from a posh second-hand watch shop.

The conversations seemed a bit stilted but time will heal that.  The first piece was Quentin enthusing about the Ford Mustang but they followed that with a story about taking a 1950s Mercedes 300SL Gullwing and it's modern equivalent to London Fashion Week to see which was best according to fashionable people like Tiny Tempah and Graham Norton.  Not very interesting.  But then they recovered well with a piece on the Triumph TR7 - brilliant!

The rest of the show was pretty good too - especially a 1950s Studebaker overgrown in a field in the UK somewhere (they wouldn't tell us where) - I shall be watching again next week.

Although the super models I will be liking will be of the Ferrari/Aston Martin/Lambo etc. variety.

And Jodie Kidd.

And perhaps Helena Christensen.