Electric Generation

I am Generation X so I like Ford Capris.

My children are Generation Z so they like Instagram - or, as those of us down with the kids know it, Insta.

There is news this week of electric cars for both groups this week.

Autocar and Auto Express are both reporting the new Ford Capri which is set to be launched in a couple of weeks...

No, that doesn't look much like a Ford Capri to me either.

Meanwhile, Jack from The Fully Charged Show, takes us on a tour of the Hyundai Insta - sorry the Hyundai Inster.

Both of these are cross-over SUVs, or as I prefer to call them, stupid cross-over SUVs.

Just like with the Mustang, Ford will be cashing in on classic car names to flog large numbers of vehicles to people who don't know much about cars.  And they will succeed while seriously turning off the real car fans to the brand.  Just look at he comments under articles about the new Capri.

Here's the only electric Capri that I approve of - I have one in my loft.

Meanwhile, Gen Z are getting a pretty decent car by the look of it - and check out the comments under Jack's piece.

What does this leave for the other generations?

I predict the forthcoming Honda Dailymail for the Boomers and the Mazda Dawsonscreek for the Millennials.

We are supposedly up to Generation Alpha now.

They can have the Tesla Heyduggie.

That's Mazda Price!

No it isn't.  This Post has nothing to do with Mazda (or Asda) for that matter - but it does have a bit to do with Asda rivals Tesco.

And several news stories from the past two days.

I've just filled up my car with petrol.  At Tescos.  I was particularly amazed (you'll be amazed at a Mazda) because the receipt printer at the self-serve pump was actually working.  This is the first time in approximately 12 months that the receipt printers have been working - what is the point of having self-serve pumps if you have to go into the kiosk to get a receipt?

I was also amazed at the price - for the first time on yonks, I paid under £1 a litre:

This is down to two factors:

Factor 1 is the 12p a litre off thanks to Tesco Clubcard Fuelsave (more about that shortly)  Things are obviously looking up for Tesco - thanks to people like me, their Christmas takings were better than expected and they've got their pump receipt printers sorted.

Factor 2 is that the cost of Brent Crude has dipped below $50 a barrel.  The BBC have that covered here.  Basically, America and the Middle East are all over-producing their oil so the price is tumbling.  Middle Eastern countries such as Saudi Arabia & Iraq but not so much Jordan.

Jordan - not to be confused with the bimbo who calls herself Jordan or the BTCC Driver (and former champion) Andrew Jordan.  Now he is in the news because he has just joined the MG Triple-Eight Team.  He will be taking the place vacated by Jason Plato who is "considering other options" - that story is covered by Autosport.  I hope Jason stays with the BTCC - he clearly wants to and he hints at involvement of another manufacturer team - I wonder if he'll take his main sponsor with him  - now who was that? - oh yes, Tesco Clubcard Fuelsave - the scheme  whereby you get money off fuel if you spend lots in the store.

I believe I covered that before it even started.  And I added at the end of that article a couple of puns that were very funny - including "That's Mazda Price!"

Because it sounds like "That's Asda Price"

OK, I'll get my coat.

Beer Wagon

It is SEMA Time!

 

What is SEMA?  Well, SEMA stands for "Speciality Equipment Market Association" and every year they hold a big motor show with lots of pimped up cars, vans and other vehicles.  I first heard of it through watching American Hot-Rod with Boyd Coddington regularly unveiling his creations there.

 

The big manufacturers are also interested with contributions this year from Honda, Mazda and Toyota to name but three and some nicely tricked out vans from Mercedes that I particularly liked.

 

The SEMA 2014 Website is pretty good but does point out something I hadn't realised before - this is a TRADE ONLY event, mere members of the public can't go along!  I don't think writing a semi-serious car blog would class me as being part of the trade - shame.

 

Obviously, the American car press is full of SEMA at the moment but also the Brits and Aussies are also seeming quite enthusiastic.  That was acouple of links to cars that stood out to those journos.  Here's the one I like:

It started out as a standard, boring Kia Sedona but has been converted into a mobile bar selling Ballast Point products.  Ballast Point are a brewery/distillery formed during the last Century (1996 to be precise).  Autoguide have the story of this beer wagon here.

 

I like it because it combines two of my favourite things - beer and cars.

 

I had a look on Google Images to see if anything combined three of my favourite things - beer, cars and football. Plenty of interesting images did come up but none that met my remit - so here is a picture of Loic Remy: 

- a footballer found guilty earlier this year of drink-driving.

Shopping Car(t)

I don't often get directed to the "femail" section of the Mail Website.  But that's where I found myself reading this story.

 

I'm surprised that with the huge publicity and marketing resources Tesco have at their disposal, that I've not seen this elsewhere but I'm sure it will be turning up in every ad-break on all commercial TV channels very soon.

 

Basically, Tesco have taken an ordinary car and covered it in their grocery products to promote their latest money-off fuel promotion.

 

It is a working car but I have to question the road-legality given that its headlamps are saucepans.

Also, given what its seats are, I wouldn't fancy driving it very far... 

After studying the short video in the article, I eventually ruled out it being based on a Vauxhall Corsa and decided that it started life as one of these:

I don't know if The Mail are in league with Tesco, or with the car's designer, Anthony Farquhar-Smith - both seem to be getting a good, free ad.

 

So what next?  A Morrison's Minor or That's Mazda Price!

Lots of Fun

Car lots of fun? This amusing article on the Car&Driver site highlights the secret language used by salesmen working on America's car Lots.

Now Arthur Daley here also had his own patois used on his car lot:

But that was just Cockney - Corblimey Mate! Luvaduck. Beales - Don't talk to me about Beales!

I've been meeting a few car salesmen lately.  Never a car saleswoman - do they exist?

My wife is after a new (or newer) car - it all follows on from the little yellow light that appears in a photo in my earlier post about the MOT test.  So far we've visited (in order of appearance) our local Toyota, Mazda, Hyundai and Ford dealers for test drives.

At the moment, my wife is being "up" while I am being "Third Baseman".  However, I'm not very good at this.  When she has finalised her choice, I will switch to being "Paperboy" - a role I recently played while purchasing our new family computer.  I wasn't very good at that either.

I have seen a couple of "Lot lizards" and would wish them well with "de-horsing" given the condition of my wife's current car - but that doesn't tend to happen in Britain anyway - if they want to keep you in the place, they make you a hot coffee and you are supposed to feel guilty if you don't finish it.

If you want to understand the past two paragraphs, and this clever illustration...

...you will need to read the article.

However, if you want to understand Arthur Daley, and maybe spend some sausage and mash on a new jam-jar, then this site may be more useful.

Sat Naff

Yet another story from my new Aussie source www.caradvice.com.au.

Only trouble is - I don't think it's true.

I don't like being let down by my news sources. This comes in the wake of the shock of this month's Top Gear magazine NOT having an advert for Seat on the back page. This must be the first time in many, many years that this has happened. Certainly the All Old Top Gear Magazine from 2004 had a Seat ad on the back. An even older copy I have from 1999 has a Mazda ad on the back but we're talking a minimum of 7-years worth of Seat ads here.

And what have they put there instead? - a flamin' perfume or after-shave ad! I don't take any notice of them - the TV versions are particularly grating. Usually black-and-white and full of very pretentious people you really wouldn't want to meet. Anyone fooled by these ads must be very shallow and very gullible.

Anyway, as Ronnie Corbett would say - I digress.

The story that led me to start wittering on here is about three women who let one of these thingslead them into a lake where they nearly drowned.

It seems far-fetched that even a woman driver (only joking!) would drive into a lake. Even at night, the headlights would show up a large mass of water where a road should be.

The other suspicious thing is that this is supposed to have happened in Washington, Tyne-and-Wear. And yet there is absolutely zero mention of it on the BBC North-East Website, nor on the sites of the Sunderland Echo or Newcastle Chronicle - nor anywhere else on the Global Interweb so how on Earth did a reporter in Oz get hold of the story?

I suppose it does reinforce the need not to blindly rely on Sat-Navs though. It's not as though we haven't been warned...

Not that everyone follows such warnings...
Anyway, what's wrong with good old-fashioned maps and following signs?