Miles off

In the olden days, dodgy car dealers would turn back the odometers on vehicles to make them appear to have had less usage - and hence increase their value.

Apparently it involved a drill and the speedo cable.

You can't do that with modern cars.

Now, in the first of two Tesla stories from Reuters this week, they are accused of tampering in the opposite direction.  There is an allegation and matching lawsuit claiming that Teslas over-record their mileage so that the warranties run out quicker.

Another reason not to buy a second-hand Tesla if it's true.

The second story is about investor nervousness about brand damage done by Elon Musk.

They seem relieved that he will be reducing his Trump duties and spending more time with Tesla.

And the share price is going up despite a massive drop in profits.

I guess I don't understand finance.

I would have thought having a Nazi tosser spending MORE TIME running the company would be a bad thing.

Sounds Wrong

BMW have introduced HypersonX - Auto Express report here.

It is a way of changing the noises your electric BMW makes.

BMW says that the system will “embody the pleasure of driving for which BMW is renowned”.

Shouldn't that be “embody the pleasure of driving for which BMW was renowned in the past”.

How can anyone renown driving something like this?:

Or just about anything else in their recent offerings that isn't a 3 or 5 series saloon, coupe or estate?

And how are you supposed to say "HypersonX"?

They will probably go with "Hypersonics"

And yet I keep reading it as, "Hi, person X!"

Really OMG

Last time, I said that this... 

...wasn't an MG.

And I stand by that.

But was still shocked by the following Auto Express piece:

Not that one, although I shouldn't be shocked that Mike Rutherford is praising Trump - what's the betting he's a member of Reform?

No, this one.

Now MG are teasing a boxy, mid-sized SUV which, according to them, “echoes the spirit of young people to explore.”

The teaser pictures make it look like lots of other boxy SUVs while the remit reminds me of the boxy and now-deceased Scion xB.

The brand became defunct in 2016 after a short life.

I predict a similar fate for the MG SUV - especially as they are naming it after Elon Musk stuff.

Who will buy an MG Cyber X?

They are hoping lots of young Chinese people - they may be right.

But I hope not.

BECAUSE IT IS NOT AN MG!

OMG

This is NOT an MG.

It's an LDV.

But it is badged as an MG - an MG U9.

Not to be confused with a Yangwang U9. The story is here.  William Morris must be spinning in his grave.  It's not even a two-seater.

The case for the defence.

I may have mentioned once or twice that I can't be doing with SUVs.

And people who like cars and driving tend to agree with me.

So what is Steve Walker, Head of Digital Content, at Auto Express, doing defending the stupid things?

Is he a website geek rather than a car geek?

His bio states that he has "been a motoring journalist, road tester and editor for over 20 years" so maybe not.

He gives several reasons why SUVs are extremely popular with the buying public, specifically:

• tough looks
• higher seating position that makes it easier to get in and see out
• outdoorsy image

His words not mine.

I get the easy access angle for those of an arthritic nature.

But I certainly wouldn't call a Ford Puma "tough-looking."

In fact, don't get me started on Ford prostituting their former glories by naming SUVs after them:

• Puma
• Capri
• Mustang
• Kuga/Cougar

Back to Steve though, and for all his words, at no point does he say that HE likes SUVs.

Despite this, his article does have a pro-SUV feeling and imply a preference for them so I expected a backlash in the comments.

It is now 7pm British Summer Time and there are only 10 comments.

Three of them are from either a Chinese bot or a Chinese moron using AI.  There is a comment about the Ford Fiesta and a reply stating that they don't make them any more and the final 5 comments are a pointless argument that doesn't really go anywhere.

Meanwhile, I think SUVs don't handle properly and they all look  alike:

So there.