Horny In a Safari Park

Fox News have this new driving tip today:

Don't get between a mother rhino and her child.

Fair enough.  But surely one for West Africa rather than the West Midlands?

Well not according to this story.  Or this Skoda Fabia that got between a rhino mother and her child:

The story helpfully has a picture of the rest of an undamaged Skoda Fabia so that the American readers have an idea what we are talking about here.

Bit of a boring car but at least it isn't a cross-over.

The West Midlands Safari Park (for that is where this happened) are refusing to pay out as apparently the Terms and Conditions that you read and accept (well "accept" anyway) on entering state that you take responsibility for any rhino damage to your vehicle.

And it's not the first time this has happened.  Check out the Birmingham Mail from 2015.

Again, terms and conditions were referenced when considering the considerably less damage to the rear of a Mitsubishi Warrior - a huge ugly tank of a vehicle.  the woman in charge of it (the car not the rhino) said, "We were absolutely petrified. I dread to think what would’ve happened if we’d been in a smaller, lighter vehicle.”

Well now she knows.

Monkey Business

Staff at Longleat Safari Park have given their monkeys a car according to The BBC today.They could have chosen a better one though.

A C-Class saloon of that vintage only has one (admittedly large) windscreen wiper.

That is nowhere near enough to satisfy that number of monkeys.

Actually, looking at that picture a bit more closely, that isn't a saloon - it's an estate. That means twice the window-wiper fun!

To be fair, Longleat did also supply a roof-rack with a suitcase so that would help a little.

I visited Longleat a few years back but, much to my childrens' annoyance, I took the detour which avoided the risk of monkeys attacking or defecating upon my beloved car.

This story mustn't be confused with the Daily Mail's attempt in 2009 to reinforce the anti-Scouse stereotype as mentioned in my post Mexican Stand-off when they ran this story about the monkeys in Knowsley Safari Park in Liverpool.