Fair deal?

The Discovery Quest Channel has started showing Wheeler Dealers.

This is excellent news for me - Quest is a Freeview Channel and I am a big fan of the show.

They have started to show the episodes right back from the first series in 2003.

For those of you unfamiliar with the programme, used car dealer Mike Brewer buys a classic car in need of a little attention at a knock-down price.  Then, trusted mechanic Edd China gives the car the attention and finally Mike sells the car on for a profit (if you don't count Edd's labour).

I have heard speculation over the years that all is not what it seems on this show.

I have heard that the people Mike buys the cars off and those he sells them to are production staff from the show.

I have heard that Edd doesn't do any of the work.

This interview from Total Car Magazine implies all is legit.  This is from this year.

This forum post from Wheel Whores implies otherwise.  This is from 2008.

A guy calling himself Pete Nice says he pretended to be the bloke Mike bought a knackered Beetle off -  this would be him:

Indeed, in the episode, this bloke is called Pete.

 

The episode involved converting the Beetle into a Beach Buggy.

 

Whether or not it is the same Pete is open to conjecture but there is something fishy in that episode from Series 2.  The knackered old Beetle had registration number FTD 243J.  That plate appears on the workshop wall behind Edd during that episode: 

However, when the conversion is complete, the finished Beach Buggy sports a completely different registration number - UPW 450H: 

That, to me, implies a completely different, slightly older, base car was used.

 

But never mind.

 

I would have thought, nowadays, if the show wasn't genuine, they would have to declare that bits were fabricated for entertainment purposes.  There are certainly such disclaimers on American Hot-Rod and Classic Car Rescue.

 

However, in 2003 such rules probably didn't exist.

 

Let's just say all is legit today.

 

Deal?

Restoring the Faith

We seem to have a plethora of car make-over/restoration shows on UK telly at the moment.

We have series 2 of Channel 5's Classic Car Rescue on a Monday night.  We have ongoing Wheeler Dealers on Discovery.  Quest are repeating Chop Shop, London Garage on a Thursday and we have a new entry from Channel 4 on a Sunday namely, For The Love of Cars:

This features Philip Glenister and "internationally renowned car designer" Ant Anstead restoring classic British cars.  I put that bit in quotes because that is how Channel 4 describe him - I'd never heard of him before and he does seem to be an extremely competent mechanic/car restorer - not too sure about the relevance of his design qualifications though.

 

Ant gets on with the actual restoration work while Phil becomes DCI Gene Hunt with ever-varying amounts of stubble and goes out to have adventures and meet people and groups with stories to tell of whichever vehicle is up for restoration that week.

 

Week one saw the Escort Mexico in the picture above - the best bit was the look on the face of a Liverpool Police Officer who used to drive one in the '70s.  They were interviewing him for the series in a back alley somewhere on Merseyside and he suddenly heard the siren approaching of one of the cars in the fleet he used to use.  He got to drive it again and meet up with a '70s car-thief too.

 

Week two was the Series I Land-Rover where Phil got to meet a Landie enthusiast who you wouldn't want to meet down the pub and another who you definitely would - they even named the restored Landie after him.

 

Next week it's the Triumph Stag - really looking forward to see what they do with my favourite classic.

 

Classic Car Rescue, which I did a bit about Series 1 on, has changed a little bit.  There are still the silly, contrived, badly-acted arguments but I think there is a little more actual car restoration being shown.  The final valuation now comes in via "classic car expert" Paul O'Neill.  I put that in quotes because Paul O'Neill is an ex-Touring Car Driver who does the Twitter bits during the BTCC Coverage and is the brother of a Spice Girl.  I'm a big fan of Paul (him being a Scouser helps) but I've never heard him described as a "classic car expert" before.

 

Bernie Fineman's previous show, Chop Shop, London Garage is probably the nearest to what I think of as the original and best show like these, American Hot-Rod which I posted about back in 2011.  These two shows are more make-over than restoration but enthralling viewing to me.

 

According to wiki though, American Hot-Rod wasn't the first - Wheeler Dealers is older - and still going strong.  I love Wheeler Dealers but it's quite rare that I get to watch it because it is on Pay-TV - this is surely a prime show for Quest to take on?

 

Anyway, I hope as many of these shows continue as possible for many years into the future when one day they will be restoring Nissan Jukes and Citroen DS3s.

Mutually Beneficial

The BBC should become the UK's biggest mutual company to make it more accountable to licence fee payers - so says former culture secretary Dame Tessa Jowell.  The BBC report it here.

Mutual companies do not have external shareholders but all members of the company are considered owners. Money is reinvested back into the company rather than paid out as dividends.

I would like to be a member of the BBC.

If I was a member of the BBC, I might have had a say in the disposal of the F1 rights which led me to declare that I'd had it with the BBC.

I might also have a say in commissioning a new motoring show for BBC2.

But, I hear you say, BBC2 already has a brilliant motoring show called "Top Gear."

I agree - it does.  In fact Top Gear is my favourite show of any genre on television - it's even better than QI.

But I also want a show that is a bit more about the cars themselves - and accessories and racing and motoring law - and the sort of things you might read about on a car blog named after a small car from British Leyland.  I've been watching a couple of the old Top Gears from the '80s and '90s on Youtube and I want a show like that.  Or like Channel 4's Driven before they made it juvenile.

It would have to be on the BBC for two reasons:

1. Impartiality - they mustn't be afraid of upsetting motoring manufacturers who could sponsor them - allegedly Toyota refused to let Jeremy Clarkson test-drive any more of their cars after he called the Corolla "dull" in a review.
2. Profitability - I don't believe that enough people watch ordinary car programmes to make then viable commercially.  This leads to daft competitions that cost £1.50 to enter and added contrived "entertainment" like they put in the otherwise enjoyable Classic Car Rescue - this can be really cringeworthy to watch but seems to draw in the viewers.

The new show would be called "Second Gear" (or "Fourth Gear" if they showed it on BBC Four) and would need some decent presenters.  Definitely not the ones from "I Want That Car" - my review of which has garnered a very large number of hits for some reason - no comments, just hits.

I liked the old Top Gear presenters, Sue Baker, Chris Goffey and William Woollard so wouldn't object to any of them coming back although dare I say they are probably a bit long in the tooth nowadays?  William Woollard's style with a foot on the bumper of the car he was discussing has led to an Internet craze which had passed me by until I read this from the Metro newspaper (no relation).

But the lineup I'd probably plump for would be former Driven host Mike Brewer as the front man assuming I could prise him away from The Discovery Channel. I've got a leather jacket just like that by the way: 

Maybe Jason Dawe (Used Car Roadshow and series 1 of the revamped Top Gear before they decided James May would be a better fit) for the more serious, practical items:

Tom Ford (ex of Fifth Gear and still of TopGear Magazine) for road tests: 

And Sabine Schmitz for the racy stuff:

A half an hour show every Thursday evening.  Just before "Dave Allen at Large."  Sorted.

 

Oh, and can we have "Gardener's World" followed by "One Man and His Dog" on a Friday again please?

Classic Car Rescue

Since Channel 5 lost Fifth Gear to Discovery UK, they have obviously needed something else to fill that gap and they have come up with Classic Car Rescue.

It's on a Monday evening at 8pm (9pm Channel 5+1 Time) We are now half-way through the series.

In this Blog, I will review the show in the style of…the show. You will read me giving my opinions of the bust-ups and the work that goes on in restoring some classic motors from the past, turning them from barely scrap value to (literally) prize condition. I will comment about how Cockney mechanic Bernie Fineman has teamed up with Canadian Car Salesman Mario Pacione (no, I hadn’t a clue about him either) to buy and restore classic cars such as the E-Type Jag and an MGB GT. I’ll also tell you about their very contrived arguments and apparently catastrophic set-backs.

I was fully aware of Bernie Fineman from his previous work on Bangla Bangers and Chop Shop, London Garage – a couple of Channel 4 series where he was teamed up with a Bangladeshi designer so that they could have very fake arguments and produce some impressive-looking motors. I had never heard of Mario Pacione and wouldn’t be surprised if Bernie hadn’t either before he was teamed up with him to make this series.

This series is definitely more of the same except the arguments seem even more fake.

Each episode starts with them deciding what make of classic car to restore – so far we’ve had an E-Type, a Porsche 911 and an MGB and next week, it’s a Mustang. Once the car has been decided upon, Bernie will go out and about and try to find one. First, he will succeed in finding one that is a complete mess that the seller wants far too much money for. Bernie will then succeed in finding another one that is also a mess. He will then buy that one at a price that either he or Mario is not happy with. We will then be told how much it will cost to restore the car and that, to keep down costs, Bernie’s team of mechanics will be given a very, very short time period in which to do it.

Both partners will go out and source some spare or replacement parts from some local Cockney and/or Asian characters. Would it be wrong to call this ethnic group Cockasians?

Then it’s time for a near disaster followed by one of the partners (usually Mario) doing something really stupid and the other partner shouting at him, then storming off.

Next we get the good bit of the show – a look at the actual restoration work interspersed with a few interesting facts and figures about the history and manufacture of the featured car.

Now it’s time for a break – this Blog is sponsored by Adrian Flux Insurance – at least I wish it was – I could do with the cash. After the break, I’ll tell you about the door-slamming and how a posh bloke will value the car at more than was spent on it. There’s also a chance to win a copy of the finished Blog.Adrian Flux – for all your insurance needs – I’d like them to sponsor my Blog now please.

In the first part of this Blog, we learned that Cockney mechanic Bernie Fineman has teamed up with Canadian Car Salesman Mario Pacione to buy and restore classic cars. We know Bernie buys a classic car in need of much work and gives his team a very short timescale to complete it. Some parts will have been purchased and Bernie will then have had a contrived argument with Mario and one of them will have stormed off, slamming a door very loudly behind him.

We then see the conclusion of the restoration including the paint-job and the electrics. This is very reminiscent of American Hot-Rod and the whole series does have a strong American Hot-Rod vibe. Which is good. Mostly.

Each episode ends with a professional car valuer turning up in his BMW 850 and telling them what he believes the restored car to be worth. It’s been a respectable profit each time so far. The production company then presumably buy the car and give it away to the winner of an expensive-to-enter competition.

So, it’s a case of enjoyable car bits, and very irritating fake bits – like American Hot-Rod. Now, if you would like to win* a copy of this Blog, just answer this easy question and transfer £1.50 into my bank account:

What is Bernie Fineman’s surname?
A: FINEMAN
B: JONES
C: £1.50

*Terms and conditions apply – the main one being that this isn’t a real competition.