Saturday, 31 August 2013

Powerrrrrrr!

Found this on Pistonheads this morning.

Poor acting. Cheesy music. A beige car. Four minutes too long.

And great, silly fun!

Sunday, 25 August 2013

Holiday Photos

I've been on my holidays!
 
Did anyone notice that I hadn't posted anything for over two weeks?
 
Why not?
 
Anyway, I went to Gran Canaria.
 
Whilst there I read two books and the September issue of Top Gear Magazine.
 
The two books were "Me Of Little Faith" by Lewis Black which had nothing to do with cars whatsoever and "Back Story" by David Mitchell (the comedy actor/writer not the author).  This had almost nothing to do with cars apart from the revelation that when he tried to learn to drive at the age of 17, his instructor stopped the car and told the young Mitchell how he had seen an alien spacecraft land.
 
David Mitchell never went on to get a licence.
 
I've been meaning to mention Top Gear Magazine for a while now - they "refreshed" it again a couple of months ago.
 
This is a term used by marketing people and Tesco Store managers for moving stuff around.
 
In Tescos this means you can't find anything so I stop going there. The Top Gear Magazine refresh wasn't too bad and they've introduced a couple of new features like "Ask Uncle TopGear" and "James May's Almanac" that are quite amusing.
 
Now for the photos I took while I was there:
A fine example of an elderly Fiat 500 - the original one.  You can really see just how small it is when parked in a car park amongst ordinary vehicles. 
Talking of small, here is a Renault Twizy.  I saw one here in Britain once but it was covered in the car-dealer's logos and travelling in the opposite direction to me so it was a fleeting glimpse.  I actually got to take a peek inside this one.  When I posted on this car a while back I implied that I didn't like it.  Now, having seen one close up, I still think it's horrible. 
Talking of horrible, that is a word I would never use to describe this Volkswagen Kharmann Ghia. 
I might use it to describe the Dacia Logan (or budget brand Renault - I think it's based on an earlier shape Clio but don't hold me to that).  This car is probably quite common-place if you are in Southern or Eastern Europe but they don't sell them here so I took a photo of it. 
Talking of "they don't sell them here so I took a photo of it" - here's a Mark 2 (I think) Ford Mustang.
 
 
...and the weather was nice and I got a bit of a tan.

Friday, 9 August 2013

Lashed

It looks like the stick people stickers I posted about on Tuesday are quite prevalent and embarassing Stateside.  American Insurance site, carinsurance.com, have produced this article on embarassing cars, car colours and accessories.  Sorry, as they are American, that should read "colors".

Unfortunately, they chose the top 12 cars for their survey rather than just opening it up to the public and this is the list after the votes were counted:
1. Smart Fortwo (7.6)
2. Nissan Cube (3.6)
3. Hummer H2 (3.5)
4. Chevrolet SSR (2.1)
5. Volkswagen New Beetle (1.9)
6. Subaru Baja (1.6)
7. Lincoln Town Car (1.6)
8. Pontiac Aztek (1.4)
9. Chrysler PT Cruiser (1.0)
10. Honda Element (0.9)
11. Chevrolet HHR (0.7)
12. Nissan Murano CrossCabriolet (0.3)

The numbers in brackets are the cars "Cringe scores" so I really don't think the bottom three should be in the list at all. The Smart scored badly, rather unfairly, due to a preception that it is "not safe".  At least the reason for the Lincoln Town Car & Chrysler PT Cruiser was they are "too Grandpa" - "ha ha!" says the Jaguar driver.
 
The Americans should be lucky they never had the Fiat Multipla or the car I was once subjected to, the Mercedes Vaneo.
 
The accessories list is much more cut-and-dried:
 
Headlight eyelashes34%
Bumper sticker for a candidate who lost18%
Fast and Furious-style spoilers and wings15%
‘My child is an honor student’ bumper sticker13%
Stick-figure family decals13%
 
I really hate the headlight eye-lashes.
Why?
 
 
Fox News also had the story.  Apart from getting the accessories in the wrong order, they also express surpise at no mention of "truck nuts" - something I was aware of and hate nearly as much as the lashes and also no mention of unicorn antenna balls - something I wasn't aware of and was pleased not to be aware of.  Check this out for a cringe.
 
 
Again, why?
 

Tuesday, 6 August 2013

My Family

No, not the popular BBC Sitcom which, in the good old days featured the brilliant Kris Marshall before he went off to appear in the terrible BT adverts which then went on to spawn another series of even worse BT adverts.
 
No, I am talking about the My Family stick people who have taken Australian rear car windows by storm and are apparently doing the same here.

I learnt about them from this Independent story by Gillian Orr (or "Grr!" to her friends).  The idea is you buy stickers to match your own family which can include grandparents and pets.
I wasn't too sure myself - I'm not too keen on window stickers that obstruct views and I also think of them like tattoos which I also don't like as I see it as defacing something nice like a human body or my car.
 
But then I took a look at their UK Website and started selecting characters that matched my own family.  Quite good fun but I won't be shelling out the £9.96 it would cost for these four people.  This will also discrimate against people with big families - it could cost a fortune and they won't be able see properly out of the back of their people-carriers.


Apparently, in Australia, there has been a bit of a backlash and various spoof versions are now appearing including pregnant teens and families with nooses.
Grr! states that "It is yet to be seen whether My Family Stickers will be a big hit over here, but you can bet they’ll be every bit as divisive"
 
Nah, I doubt if most people will even notice them.