"There's no such thing as The Fast Lane"

That's what I always tell people anyway.

If you're on a Motorway, the first lane, as frequented by lorries and Daewoo Matiz's, is the lane you are supposed to drive in. This is often erroneously referred to as "The Slow Lane".

The second lane, as frequented by women in Fiestas with "Baby on Board" stickers and lorries driving at 1mph more than those in the first lane, is the lane you are supposed to use solely for overtaking lorries and Daewoo Matiz's.

The third lane, as frequented by Audis and BMWs travelling at 99mph and pensioners travelling at 69mph ("They don't need to get past me bacause the speed limit is 70mph - ooh look at that naughty person in his flash car passing me on the inside! He won't get there any quicker you know, Mabel") This lane should be used for overtaking the women in Fiestas with "Baby on Board" stickers and lorries driving at 1mph more than those in the first lane. This is often erroneously referred to as "The Fast Lane".

This post will be a mystery to those who read my blog from the other side of the Atlantic where "undertaking" on the freeways is perfectly legal. It makes so much more sense to be allowed to pass slower vehicles on either side and I would love to see that introduced here but, alas, I think there would be carnage for as long as it took everyone to get used to the idea so it can never happen.

Now here is a "fast lane"/"slow lane" that I would like to see introduced...
I believe that this should be introduced nationally and especially in supermarkets.