I Don't Watch "I'm A Celebrity"

Well, I did briefly when Johnny Rotten was in there.

But that's just the sort of anarchic rebel I am.

 

Anyway, this year they've got Harry Redknapp, the scary woman from The Chase and Noel Edmonds.

 

Or, as I prefer to call him, former Top Gear presenter Noel Edmonds.

 

Unusually, the BBC are covering an IACGMOOH story today.  Here it is.

 

It is how Noel may have got himself in trouble with Bristol City Council for a second time for driving in their bus lanes.

 

Here is an actual Bristol Bus Lane sign:

It's on Highwood Road in Patchway, quite close to the Coniston Road junction.  It was a Sunday.

 

Now that sign clearly has a picture of what is allowed to be in that lane - a bike, a bus and the word "taxi" because whoever designs these signs couldn't differentiate between a taxi and an ordinary car so gave up.  It's one of those things like motorway matrix signs not being able to animate fog so they just have the word "Fog"

But I digress.  Back to Noel.

 

In order to speed up his journeys around Bristol, Noel bought a taxi, a proper black cab, and used the bus lanes.  The council decided that because he wasn't a licensed taxi, he should be fined so they sent him a ticket.

 

Noel said, "Fair enough", paid the fine and bought a bus.

 

But Bristol Council has now said their bus lanes are only for licensed buses - which is the argument they used for the taxi and I don't think is very fair - the word "licensed" does not appear anywhere on the sign.

 

To get around it, though, all Noel needs to do is find an old licensed bus maybe from another part of the country, and lease it for his personal use.

 

And in case Bristol City Council say it has to be a Bristol bus, he should make sure it is one of these: 

It was built by The Bristol Bus Company.

Easy Come, Easy Go.

An unnamed German 18-Year old passed his driving test.

Yippee!

Then, less than an hour later he passed one of these:

at 60mph in a 30mph zone.

He has been formally banned for four weeks, but police said he would only get his licence back after "expensive retraining".  He is also facing a €200 fine, two points on his licence once it is restored, and his probationary period as a new driver has been lengthened from two years to four.  The BBC story I nicked this paragraph from is here.

I bet his four mates in the car with him were impressed.

Dummkopf.

Train Wreck

No, I'm not talking about The Government's handling of Brexit - I'm talking about an "Only in Norfolk" story.

Only in Norfolk could you be involved in a road-traffic accident with this:

It's a 1912 Y14 steam locomotive.  Quite impressive.

 

And while the locomotive was far from wrecked, there will be some serious buffing out of the Mercedes A-Class that it was in collision with:

Nobody was injured.  The BBC News story is here.

 

The train was travelling at 8mph at the time, we don't know the speed of the car but its driver was heading to the golf club and seems to have missed the fact that the level crossing lights and sirens were active at the time.

 

His insurance claim is going to make interesting reading and his insurance company will presumably have to cover any damage to the loco - good job it wasn't a new one.

My Wife Doesn't Like Jeremy Vine

He irritates her on his Radio 2 show.  I am indifferent towards him.

We both like his brother though.

But I am going off Jeremy myself now.

 

Because of this article.  He says that the Drivetime show (as discussed by me last month) shouldn't be called "The Drivetime Show" because it celebrates "a form of transport that kills 1700 people a year."

 

Vine said "the show needed a new name for post-car Britain".  But there are still plenty of cars about when I'm driving home.

 

He added that "our addiction to the motor vehicle has made our cities traffic sewers; made us asthmatic, fat and angry; and made our planet suffer".  Speak for yourself mate - I'm not a fat asthmatic.

 

This means that he has slipped right down the rankings in my list of favourite Jeremys.  Obviously Clarkson and Corbyn are at the top closely followed by Hardy but Vine has now gone from mid-table (Paxman, Irons etc.) right down to Hunt, Kyle territory.

 

I wonder what he thinks of hybrid cars - I suspect that he will be very unimpressed by this BBC story.

 

The gist is that lots of fleet buyers bought hybrid cars for the subsidies and tax breaks offered by the Government and many are never charged up so just end up as fuel inefficient petrol cars. "Many drivers may never have unwrapped their charging cables" it says - I'm not sure how they can know that but I suppose it is quite possible.

 

Basically, the Ministry of Transport have not thought this through properly.

 

I think that the Transport Minister should resign.

 

Oh. He has.

Lucozade Aids Recovery

But does it aid recovery vehicles?

One might be needed since I suspect it doesn't aid the clear signalling of a Heavy Goods Vehicle. 

The BBC story is here.

 

The lorry in question was also over the permitted weight limit.

 

Probably too many sugary drinks.

Faraday has no Future

Not for the foreseeable anyway.

I've covered Faraday Future twice before.

In 2015 and again in 2017.

Caradvice.com.au have the latest Faraday Future story here.  The directors are resigning and the funding is being refused which will probably mean no FF91:

Shame.

 

But I have learned a new F Word.

 

furlough - noun. a set period of time during which an employee does not report for work and does not earn a wage. The employee retains their job during the salary furlough, however, which means that the employee retains benefits.

 

I'm sure that lots of other F Words are being used too though.