Bond Villain

My story last month about Roger Moore didn't really have much to do with James Bond but this one does actually involve Steven Berkoff who played General Orlov in Octopussy alongside Roger Moore.

Now, being a Daily Mail story, they do enjoy a misleading headline.

For example: Pay and dismay: Mercedes left marooned after builders excavate station car park around it

No it wasn't, the story here clearly states that the builders left an escape ramp.

Another good example: Mystery solved! Elizabeth Hurley's car found covered in parking tickets after reports it was stolen during shopping trip

No it wasn't - it had three on it. Story here. Nearly another James Bond connection though - she was a star of Austin Powers which is a very entertaining JB spoof.

Anyway, the misleading Berkoff headline is James Bond villain Steven Berkoff, 75, banned from the road for jumping red light when he heard police sirens

He wasn't. He lost his licence for getting 12 penalty points on it. He also rather naughtily tried to declare his Californian driving licence number but that didn't work.

He claimed he moved through the red lights to get out of the way of an emergency vehicle. Seems like a reasonable thing to do, although he did it at 27mph!

It did get me thinking about what I would do if waiting at traffic lights and an emergency vehicle came up behind with its sirens blaring and lights flashing. What is the correct thing to do?

Well, thank you to Jerry from Lincolnshire who taught me something when he added the following comment to the Mail article, "It is absolutely never the right thing to do to pass a red light in these circumstances. It is absolutely not a defence to the crime of passing a red light to say you moved to allow a blue light vehicle to pass. If you do pass a red light and get prosecuted any compentent lawyer will advise you to plead guilty and try to minimse the sentce through mitigation. Emergncy vehicle drivers are trained that if they are behind a vehicle stopped at a red light they MUST wait for the light to go green before they can expect the vehicle in front to move. They are also supposed to turn off any siren until the light change but can keep blue lights on."

What he says is backed up here so I gave his comment a green up-arrow.


Now, basically, Berkoff jumped a red light at nearly 30mph, pretended he didn't have a British driving licence and claimed he was making way for an emergency vehicle. Worse than that, he was driving a Beetle.

General Orlov would not have been impressed.

Tailgating - Good or Bad?

It depends upon if you are British or American.

If you are British, then this is tailgating:although, really you need to replace the car in the mirror with an Audi.

Anyway, it's not a good thing - in fact, it's a downright dangerous thing. If you are American, then tailgating seems to involve a barbecue:
Here's a better picture -it actually involves a pretty girl tailgate:

Here in Britain, we have things called "car boot sales" which do not involve the purchase of cheap car boots (or "trunks" if you are American - trunks to us are what elephants have or what men wear to swim in)

In America, they have tailgate thefts which I would have assumed to be thefts from the cargo bays of Pick-Up Trucks but actually is the theft of the vehicle tailgate itself. Fox News reported on it yesterday together with some statistics on cities, States and makes of vehicle most likely to be targetted and tips on how not to let it happen to you.

Meanwhile, North of the border (in Canada not Scotland) they have a different crime again called "curbsiding" which has nothing to do with Kerb-crawling. The Canadian car-site I sometimes delve into had this story last month. Apparently, this particular crime is trading in used (often repaired after damage) cars while pretending to be a private seller and not disclosing the history of the car. Although, if anyone repaired and then sold on the car they used to illustrate the story, then good luck to them:

Whatever motoring crime you decide to take part in, if caught, you may well end up before a judge.

And that judge may well be an expert on motoring crime.

Like this chap.

Holden Out For A Hero

My favourite Aussie car news site has got very excited this morning about the launch of the new Holden VF Commodore - the latest family sedan from GM's Australian Division.

Due to the geography of Australia, the family sedan is still important down there just like the Cavalier and Sierra used to be over here. This is an entirely Australian designed and built car but the question is, will it look like GM's American Chevrolet Cruze:

or GM's European Vauxhall/Opel Insignia?

Well, here's the conclusive answer:

Glad that small matter is cleared up.

The launch itself was quite interesting. Catch the video here if you want although it was mostly concerned with the impressive technological features of the new car. It was fronted by Holden's MD which may stand for Managing Director (his job) or Mike Devereaux (his name).

It is only at the very end of the launch video that you actually get to see the car but I've just shown it to you anyway.

The Americans are quite interested, AutoGuide had the story here - they are interested in the implications for a new Chevy SS.

Even before the launch, though, the Aussies were looking further ahead to the VF replacement on sale in 2017. I think they were trying to reassure Australia that there was a longer-term future for The Commodore but to quote one of the comments added below the story, "Stealing a bit of the VF's thunder. It no longer seems as important now." Oops.

Still, I wouldn't go Holden a grudge about it.

Roger Moore is no Saint

No, not THAT Roger Moore!

THIS Roger Moore:

I think he may be a bit camera-shy.

Flicking through the Plymouth Evening Herald (as I often don't) this story amused me. It tells of a man who tried to get out of a speeding ticket in a courtesy car by saying that the offence happened after he had returned it to the garage. To try to prove this, he faked the date stamp on his home CCTV system to show his own car at home at the time of the offence.

It seems a lot of trouble to go to in order to avoid a £60 fine, but then again, the investigation seems like a lot of effort to go to over a £60 fine.

The investigator pointed out that the shadows were wrong for the time of year that the speeding occurred so Roger was found guilty, ordered to pay £2000 costs and given a suspended 16 week jail sentence.

A daft crime without a shadow of doubt.

Racing Legends

This short series concluded on BBC Two last night.

I say "short" because it was only on for three episodes and the first two went out on consecutive nights - so why we had to wait a month for the third I'm not sure.

It was mostly a programme about knights.

In the first show, Sir Patrick Stewart spoke about and met Sir Stirling Moss. In the second show, car-nut and chef (but no knight) James Martin enthused about and met Sir Jackie Stewart and in show 3, Sir Chris Hoy learned all about Colin McRae who probably should have been a knight.

The BBC info on the series is here but the gist is that someone famous goes over a racing legend's life & career and with a little training, gets to drive that legend's racecar.

Since the first shows are now fairly distant memories, all I can really remember is that Stirling Moss is a Jewish name and that James Martin can't say "Formula 1" - he kept calling it "formlia 1" - very irritating.

Ironically - no, not ironic just sad - the only one of the legends not with us today is the youngest, Colin McRae, the subject of last night's show.

He will be known by anyone under the age of 20 as "the bloke behind those video games" but McRae was, indeed, a racing legend. He was winning from an early age although he did have the best start you could wish for given that his father was the very successful rally star Jimmy McRae, pictured above with Sir Chris. Jimmy played a big part in the show and showed that he hasn't lost any of his own skills.

Colin became the first British winner of the WRC whilst driving for Subaru where he proved a worthy match for his more experienced team-mate Carlos Sainz who spoke warmly about Colin in the show.

Colin was a driving genius - but I think the show showed us that he was a flawed genius too. His desire to win, meant that sometimes, he drove too hard. In 2001, driving for Ford, he nearly won the WRC again. He went into the last race one point up and was leading when he crashed out rather spectacularly. In 2005, he nearly won the Paris-Dakar Rally (which nowadays doesn't go anywhere near Paris or Dakar but in 2005 did actually still finish in Dakar) when, comfortably leading he crashed out rather spectacularly.

It's worth taking a look at him in the US X Games event though, driving too hard while trying to take the lead:He finished second.

Sadly he was killed, along with his young son, another boy and a friend in 2007 when a helicopter he was piloting crashed near to his home in Scotland. The inquiry verdict blamed him.

His father said, "We still believe we will never know what caused the crash but we were never in any doubt as to Colin's prowess as a fine pilot. Everybody knows from Colin's rallying career that safety is always an issue and that his reactions and eye and hand co-ordination were world-class."

He may be speaking the truth - I would love to believe that - or he may be in denial - the verdict statements seemed quite unequivocal.

"If in doubt - flat out!"

A sad end to a fine career and a fine series.