Cross about fines

Four different motoring stories have appeared at the front of the BBC News Website today.

The first one (link here) is basically a non-story but it probably got there because it is about London.  Although, having said that, the victims weren't from London.  Basically, the ANPR cameras used at the Dartford Crossing were sometimes providing blurred images which meant that the number plates were being mis-read and fines for non-payment were being sent out to people who hadn't driven through it.

It got Vs and Ys mixed up and Cs and Gs and Os and Ds.

I should be worried as Y, G and O all appear in my registration number.

But given we are talking a small number of mistakes out of 55 million journeys, I won't be shelling out for a private plate just yet.

Then again, given the technology used, surely they could tell if a number plate didn't match the vehicle on the photo and then give those few cases to a human being to manually check.  In the case of one complainant - a woman who fell victim of the C & G scenario, the BBC state that:

 "The vehicle pictured was remarkably similar to hers, a silver Honda Jazz, while Eleanor drives a silver Honda CRG"

No she doesn't.  There's no such thing.

She might drive a Honda CRV - she looks like she might.  But I thought you were supposed to get Vs mixed up with Ys not with Gs.

Anyway, here's a silver Honda Jazz.

and here's a much larger silver CRV...

Not seeing a remarkable similarity myself.

Story number 2 involves learner drivers who are fed up with waiting times, so they are booking practical tests through brokers who block-book and re-sell the tests for hundreds of pounds.

My local Test Centre, according to their story, has a wait if 9.5 weeks, or 2 months in real money.

Quite a few centres though have a wait of 24 weeks, or 4 months.

"The test time, location and provisional licence number can be changed at any time, making it easy to rebook or re-sell driving test slots."

Right, well there's the solution - the provisional licence number should be fixed on booking - no changes, only refunds - problem solved.

Story number 3 involves the exploitation of a Nissan Micra with a failed rear axle.

As Frankie Howerd used to say, "Don't mock the afflicted!"

But Banksy has done just that with his take on the Suzuki Jimny spare wheel cover.

I've just taken a stroll down that road on Google StreetView and it's a public road so I hope that car is taxed or it could get towed and then you'd be left with a rhino in mid-jump.

I suppose then it could become a photo opportunity for people to park their own vehicle, wheelie-bin, pram, wife etc. there.

And the fourth story is a boring one about potholes.  Although Alan from Macclesfield has climbed into one which makes a change from the usual photos of local Tory councillors pointing at one.

World In Motion

 There is so much wrong with this photo.

And I say that as someone who was born just after ENGLAND - not GB, won the World Cup.  I was born about 20 days before Tony Adams (MBE apparently) and he was the first England player to be born after ENGLAND - not GB, won the World Cup.

Next issue - I am 57 years old so whoever has chosen that plate is living somewhat in the past.

Next up (and this isn't an issue if they are stuck in a traffic jam) is how close whoever has taken that photo is to the car in front.  While on the plus side, it looks to have been taken from the passenger seat so at least the driver isn't messing about with a mobile phone.

Now wouldn't you have thought that a proud British patriot would have bought a British car? Not a 2018 Subaru Forester XT SYMM with CVT.  If you are impressed that I can tell the transmission from the back of the car, you don't know about mycarcheck.

But, apart from all that, nice photo.

Dog in Boots.

Not the chemist shop.

Unless you particularly dislike cats and dogs, (not the film - that really is awful) you will probably appreciate what Battersea Dogs Home (as I always remember it being called) do.

So I was rather surprised when this shaggy dog story appeared from Battersea Power Station rather than from their neighbours south of the river.

It involves an electric pooch pampering station for the back of large cars - specifically, Genesises.

Even more specifically, Genesis GV70s.

Genesis, not the band, who are also known as posh-Kia (by me), seem to have teamed up with Battersea Power Station and have an exhibition on there - or a "studio" which they describe as, "more like stepping into a contemporary gallery than visiting a car dealership."

Hmm.

The dog-module is currently on display there.

When I saw it, I thought the story looked more dodgy than doggy but it is apparently true - even if the number plate is fake:

Falling for it.

That title would work better with American readers.

And it's taken an Australian site to point this story out to me.

It's a crime that only works in the Autumn.

A UK driver taped a leaf over one letter of his number plate in order to fool speed cameras.

Ingenious.

Until you think about it.

That last character must be a letter of the alphabet but can't be an I or a Q.

The remaining characters are visible and the colour, make and model of car will be visible too - I wonder if it was a Nissan Leaf.

So not surprising that he was caught and fined.

So no more Autumnal tomfoolery.

He'll have to wait for Spring now when the blossom is out.

The Green Flash

Remember October last year when I told you about green number plates?

Of course you do.

Well, as of today they are a thing. Autocar have the story - not seen it anywhere else.  The Government have plumped for this design:

Basically, just a green flash.

"But, what is the point?" I hear you ask.

Good question.

Well, they signify zero emission (aka electric) vehicles.  And, "Research carried out by Nissan and Yougov claims that 32% of people surveyed would be more likely to buy an electric car because of the new plates, and the prospect of further incentives to be rolled out as a result. This could include specific zero-emission parking zones, exemption from road charges and even zero-emission lanes."

What?

"Research carried out by Nissan and Yougov claims that 32% of people surveyed would be more likely to buy an electric car because of the new plates, and the prospect of further incentives to be rolled out as a result. This could include specific zero-emission parking zones, exemption from road charges and even zero-emission lanes."

I know but I'm still not convinced.

Anyway, being Welsh, I've always fancied one of these perfectly legal plates:

Would that entitle me to half-price road charges and to use half of the zero emission parking bays and lanes?

The biggest flaw in this plan though, is that there is nothing to stop you getting some green sticky paper and turning your diesel Volkswagen into something getting the benefits of a Renault Zoe.

And, after December 31st, the rather dim readers of the painfully sycophantic Daily Express will know exactly where to stick them: