Rifle Charge

Here is a representation of a Kalashnikov AK-47:

Here is a representation of a Kalashnikov CV-1:

I like it.

 

I think I like it because it reminds me of a slammed Escort Mk II Estate: 

Although, while looking for a decent picture of a light blue Escort Mk II Estate, I realised that I liked it because it reminded me of a slammed Cortina Mk II Estate: 

However, according to this Autocar story, it is actually designed to look like one of these:

Which, of course, is an Izh 2125 Combi.

 

No?

 

Me neither.

 

Although, if you know your Russian cars, you can see that it, in turn, was based on a Moskvitch.

 

The CV-1 is an electric car that Kalashnikov hope will be a credible Tesla rival.  Can't see it myself but I'd like to see them get some sales in this country where, being a Kalashnikov with that body-shape, I hope they call it a Shooting-Brake.

Viennese Whirl

The Great British Bake Off starts again next week.

I wonder if they'll make any Viennese Whirls?

I like Viennese Whirls.

Talking of Austria and bakers...

 

An unfortunate Austrian baker has been caught speeding 42 times since he started a new job.

 

He was travelling home in the middle of the night and didn't see the signs or the camera (which used infra-red rather than a flash).

 

Various news sources had the story - here is the BBC version.

 

He elected to pay the fines.

 

It raises several questions...

• Do they have infra-red cameras in the UK?
• Do they not have a points-based system in Austria for motoring offences?
• Why such a long gap between first offence and him finding out about it?
• Why would anyone have a 30kph speed limit?
• Is it possible to drive that slowly in the middle of the night?
• Why did he point out that his wife did not blame him for the expense?
• Any other bakers known for speed?

Kerb Your Enthusiasm

I've spelled it the English way because it's an English story.

Some silly woman in Southport is surprised that she isn't allowed to mount the kerb and drive across the pavement.

Or, in American English:

Some dumb broad in a town you've never heard of is surprised that she ain't allowed to mount the curb and droive across the sidewalk.

"droive" was a typo that I decided to leave in because it sounds New Yorkish.

Anyway, here she is:

I nearly have sympathy for her because the kerb is so low that you could drive up it without damaging your suspension.

 

But she will still be damaging the pavement.

 

And she is an Audi driver.

 

The Liverpool Echo story is here but I wouldn't bother clicking on it because the advertising on there makes it just about unreadable.

 

All we are missing in this particular non-story is a picture of the local Conservative Councillor stood there pointing at it.

Race Loser

Although geographically in the South, South Carolina was right in the middle of the US Civil War.  And the start and the end.

So maybe this stupid woman thought she had a 50/50 chance of escaping punishment there for a motoring offence with her tactic when the police officer who stopped her was white.

Her tactic was, with her being "a clean, thoroughbred white girl", to say, "You're a cop; you should know what that means."

 

A clean, thoroughbred white girl!?  The phrase "white trash" came in to my mind.  As well as not stopping at a Stop sign, she was speeding, carrying Marijuana and driving drunk.  The BBC story is here.

 

There is a lot of suspicion State-side at the moment of how the police treat different races - probably heightened by the idiot Trump allowing racists to appear empowered.  So it is a good job that the officer in question was straight.

 

The mug-shot should be a clue.

 

She was booked into the Beaufort County Detention Center and faces driving under the influence, speeding, disregarding a stop sign, simple possession of marijuana, and possession of drug paraphernalia charges, according to the jail log.

 

Stupid cow.

 

Talking of cows...

 

...and BBC news articles about car crime in southern US States...

Read more here: https://www.islandpacket.com/news/local/crime/article216168760.html#storylink=cpy

 

 

It's An Illness Stopping People Visiting Wales

 

The motorway bridge crossing the River Severn has been shut Westbound all morning.

No not that one.

 

That one is the M4 Crossing, also known as the Second Severn Crossing, also known as The Prince of Wales Bridge.  It seems to have more names than Stephen Yaxley-Lennon.  But, unlike Stephen Yaxley-Lennon, the bridge isn't a pathological liar and convicted football hooligan followed by morons.

 

In the background, you can see the bridge with the closure.  That is the M48 Crossing, also known as the original crossing.  Not named after any member of the royal family as far as I am aware.

 

Unprecedented levels of staff sickness meant that they didn't have enough people to collect toll money.  This meant that anyone travelling into Wales had to use the M4 bridge but anyone travelling out of Wales was OK because you only pay the tolls in one direction.

 

Maybe they should have just made it free in both directions for the duration.  But I guess that wouldn't have brought in the revenue that forcing motorists to detour would have done.  Not very environmentally friendly when you consider the wasted miles.

 

The scheduled closure was from 5am until 2pm - it doesn't say how they knew everyone would be well again by 2pm.

 

The BBC version of the story is here.  It is on their Gloucestershire bit not their Welsh bit.  I suppose that is logical as it is the people in Gloucestershire not the people in Wales who will have been inconvenienced.

 

Meanwhile, over on the Wales bit of the BBC News site, they have this story.

 

Wrexham Council are going to have to fork out £7100 to replace parking signs after someone went out with a black marker pen correcting errors in the Welsh translations on them:

Bet they wish they had a bridge they could charge people to cross.