The Worst Time to Have a Heart Attack is During a Game of Charades

That's my favourite joke from this nice (for once) Daily Mail story.

The story is how the management and staff of Westgate multi-story car park in Leeds are cheering up their customers with amusing quotes, sweets, competitions and, mostly, with jokes displayed in the stairwells.

The Mail, being The Mail, has to comment that some of the jokes are politically incorrect - something they are very much in favour of - and seeing as how they don't seem too politically incorrect, I can quite happily live with too.

Lots of the jokes are in the style of (or nicked from) Tim Vine and Milton Jones - two of my favourite comedians. But another favourite comedian, and Lionel Messi look-a-like, Canadian comedian Stewart Francis, is the one who I reckon is being mostly plagiarised.

The joke in the story about the '70s Karaoke Bar is one of his - as is this one which they haven't used but I just like:
"Standing in the park, I was wondering why a frisbee looks larger the closer it gets...then it hit me"

The most relevant one though is this one of Tim Vine's:
"Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels."

Take your Chevy to the levy...

...or whatever make of car you drive, if you work in Nottingham or Bristol and you drive to work, you'll have to pay for the privilege of parking there, even if you are on your employer's property.

Thanks to Auto Express for this story highlighting the crime of Bristol Council - and specifically their Lib Dems (who have always been more anti-car than the other parties) - in charging businesses a car-parking tax if they provide 11 or more spaces for their employees. At least that's how it's going to work in Nottingham - who are doing this first. That story is covered here.

The councils expect employers to pass on the tax to their staff - this, they believe will encourage the workers to use public transport. It won't. It'll just annoy everyone.

Where I work, we have 14 parking spaces, including 2 disabled bays. These are used by staff and customers alike. How would that work then? Would we staff subsidise our customers' parking? Would we just park in the streets nearby? Will the side-streets of Nottingham and Bristol fill up with parked cars?

Fortunately, I don't work in Nottingham or Bristol.

I know that if I was going to start up a new business in the UK, then Nottingham and Bristol would be off my list of possible sites - I'd just end up with extra taxes and irritated staff.

One thing for certain, this guy had better watch out...